Love and Hatred

Photo and edit by me ;)

LOVE. A simple 4-letters word. But there are many meanings of this super simple word. It has power, power to change your life. It can change you to another person that you are not either to become a good or a bad one. LOVE, is something you cannot buy with money, except with LOVE itself. LOVE can be replace with HATRED. HATRED, a word, a simple one too. Its root word is HATE, a very destructible word. It can make you in miserable, vengeance and war. LOVE AND HATRED, both are diseases. The diseases that every creatures that Allah had created will feel and diagnosed with those LOVE and HATRED diseases. Both can be cure, or plant. But it's all up to you with Allah's will.

LOVE, there are many type of LOVE. Your LOVE to God, Religion, Family and even to your best friends or the special person in your life. Seriously, I never been in any 'boyfriend and girlfriend' relationship before. Does it count when I'd said 'I Love You', almost 3 years ago, when I was 11. Yes, I'm not immature yet, in fact, I didn't reach my puberty yet. LOL. You know, I'm just a kid, but now, I admit that I'm a teen. A stage where I will be experiencing life and obstacles  more before being an ADULT is. I hope that I will never lost and being astray from the truth and light. I'm afraid, and I'm scared. Bah! I felt like Courageous the COWARDLY DOG. I often boasting to people around me, that I'm brave. Hah! That's just a lie. A fraud. I'm a coward, in fact. I'm afraid to lose my life, people around me, monsters and even bad guys. I boasted, that I don't care about love. I will never fall in love.

LETS LAUGH OUT LOUD TO ME! If you ask my friends, who am I really is and ask them what job will suit me when I'm an adult, then. They will answer like this, FATIN??!! OoOh, I THINK THAT SHE SUITS TO BE A GANGSTER? LAWYER? POLICE? TEACHER? Yeah, a gangster? LOL. Me NO BRAVE enough, YO! I always being confident when only I am in a public speaking competition, and etc. BUT, SOCIALIZING with others? Hell with my attitude. I think that no one likes me. Yes, I'M A KEWL person. Talk about LOVE, I'm kinda lame about it. I'm suck. Believe me, I'M UGLY. I'M AN IDIOT. I'M JEALOUS. JEALOUS TO ALL PEOPLE AROUND ME. They are lucky they got a best friend around their age, at least. BUT ME? DO MY FRIEND REALLY CARE ABOUT ME? I never felt being cared by my friends, somehow. I still love them. I still trust them. Crying because nobody cares about ourselves is useless, but I still cried. Cried a lot, because nobody care enough about me. I know, I'M A LIAR, I'M EVIL, I'M SUCH A SINISTER BEING, I'M A MONSTER, I'M UGLY. People always took advantages of me. Frankly, I don't like that. In fact, I hate it. Pathetic me. Poor me. Why? Why? And why? That's why I always failed in love, I mean puppy love. \got stiff neck, already T^T it hurts../

I think that there are 3 puppy love stories in my 14 years life. Hahaha, funny right? First, when I was 11, as I'd stated above, second when I was in form 1 and now. The funny thing is, how can I fell in love with my own cousin? LOL. I'd a feeling to him, once. But, now it's gone. Gone. Vanish, forever. You know what? I believe in commitment. Playing hard to get. But suddenly, I'd confessed my 'love' to a boy. LOL, he's the one that I'd talked before, Iqhmal. Yes, I still like him. But I'd to understand that, our 'love' was being inhibited because, next year he'll face SPM, while I'll be that drat PMR's victim. My parents are hoping that I will get 9As! Not even my parents, all the grownups around me are predicting that I will get 9A. I don't want to disappoint my Mama and Papa. I don't want to disappoint my grandparents. I have to study a lot, like I will face the SPM. LOL!

I think that loving ourselves is much better to love another person. I hope that I have a smoother and fairer complexion, why? Just want to satisfy myself. By the way, I'm trying to fix and repair all the damages that I had done before. Like being mean, rude, either to my family or everyone in this world. I always have a bad temper.

How about HATRED? Oh, yup. That mean word.

In past several years, I hate my life. I was full with hatred, even nowadays, you can call me as a girl full with hatred. It was because of my temper, YO! But, I couldn't describe HATRED through words if you ask me what my heart and brain define it. But maybe, the Wikipedia can help you. So, here we go!! The not quite definition of HATRED!

Hatred (or hate) is a deep and emotional extreme dislike, directed against a certain object or class of objects. The objects of such hatred can vary widely, from inanimate objects to animals, oneself or other people, entire groups of people, people in general, existence, or the whole world. Though not necessarily, hatred is often associated with feelings of anger and disposition towards hostility against the objects of hatred. Hatred can become very driven. Actions after a lingering thought are not uncommon upon people or oneself. Hatred can result in extreme behavior such as violence, murder and war.

Assalamualaikum.